Sunday, December 21, 2008

frustrated

ok, so i know i haven't posted in a while. i've just had a lot on my mind.
final crit went horribly well. in no way well, in all ways horrible.
it made me feel like a failure at life, and that i have completed nothing so far this semester. even though i spent almost every spare moment working on my thesis project. i have hit a enormous road block, that doesn't seem to be moving anytime soon. oh goody.
so, again, i must start from scratch, and think of a "new" idea for my thesis. which i'm supposed to be working on during my vacation. but so far, i have only brainstormed in my head. i haven't gotten the chance to actually try anything out because of the lovely weather in maine at the moment. ice storm, and now snow every other day. and my little car doesn't like to be driven in the snow that much. i need a good jeep or something. i'm hoping i'll get something done in the next week or so.
i'm dreading that lovely envelope in the mail with my grades, which should be arriving any day now. i know i've said it before, but i cannot wait for this school year to be over over over!!!
sorry i dont have a photo to post today, but i'll definitely have one later on. they are all on my thumbdrive...buried within my school things.
merry xmas :)

Sunday, November 30, 2008

almost

the semester is ALMOST over, and i cannot wait. i have been concentrating on everything else school related for the past week and a half, that i have seemed to have forgotten to keep up with my thesis work. i hope i'll get over that in a couple days. i should go out today and shoot a bit, but i have to finish other stuff for this week, and hopefully i'll be able to go out and about on wednesday. my "free" day of the week. i have two presentations to do this week, one tuesday and one friday. one is 8 minutes, the other only 3. i think i'll be able to handle it. i'm horrible at talking about my work, i'm never able to completely voice what i'm trying to do, i always seem to leave something out. i'll keep my fingers crossed, and hope for the very best. which reminds me, i still need to scan my old work from high school and freshman year. yay.
at least i have something figured out, i know, kind of, where i'm going with my thesis. and hopefully i'll be able to continue this through out the winter months. i had problems last year with the snow getting
in the way of what i really wanted to capture in my photos.
ugh, snow. not looking forward to that white stuff, i'm just hoping that it will hold off for another week or two, i hate driving in it.
here's a pretty spring-y picture, to get my
mind off of the snow. :) it was taken near my friends house, while we were walking her dogs.



Wednesday, November 19, 2008

falling

so, this week has been a complete train-wreck thus far. all because of a simple forgetful mistake monday morning, and that has effected the past couple days to be more stressful than they should have to be.
but! good news! i now know the direction my thesis will be going in. *yay* i will be focusing on the small details of places that i was going to be/have been photographing in the same state of mind that i was planning for my original idea for my thesis. if that makes any sense at all, i hope it does.
meaning i need to have my camera on me more often than i usually do. which i don't mind at all, for it's like an extra arm anyways.
anyways...
only a couple more days to this semester, and i can't wait, but also freaking out at the same time. so many things are due, with not much time to do it all in! i'm hoping that i'll be able to pull something off in time.
i kinda feel like i'm falling...and theres really no one to help me up. it's totally up to me to catch myself and fix everything. i feel just like the girl about to fall over in this picture i took over the summer at our old home day fair in my hometown.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

fingers crossed

i shot some photos today for what will hopefully be the new turn for my thesis. i'll find out tomorrow how it'll go, and if i need more photos to finish it. i'm crossing my fingers and hoping that it will all work out for the best for me.

i also have the BFA show to look forward to, can't wait. installation starts on friday and goes until sunday. i'm hoping i can get it all done on friday so i don't have to drive back in on saturday to finish it. i don't have much to hang, but it's the painting that i'm worried about.
anyways...

here's one of the photos i'm hanging up for the show. it was taken earlier in the fall when i was walking with some friends. i love taking pictures of mushrooms, just a heads up. :)

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

explode.

so, with stress levels rising...i went into my class on tuesday morning, and walked out twice as stressed as before. i have learned that i need to change my thesis idea completely to fit what i really want to say. o boy!
i understand why i need to do it as well as how, but why find out about it now?! when i have spent almost a full year working
on what i have at the moment. hooray for me.
so, on the verge of exploding...i decided to take some time off today, and do somewhat nothing. well, nothing that is any shape or form related to my thesis. on that note, i look forward to this upcoming weekend and week of classes that consist of me busting my butt for a result th
at i hope will be somewhat satisfying for crit in a couple weeks.
i love senior year.
speaking of exploding...if i hadn't mentioned it before, here's a lovely picture i took of some fireworks that were seen at our annual old home days celebration during the summer in my hometown.




Wednesday, October 29, 2008

fire?

This book idea is driving me somewhat crazy. I want to get it done, and done right, but it seems that momentum has been halted by some kind of decision making mechanism inside my head.
Every spare moment that i should be spending on my thesis, i decide to do something else that has nothing to do with it. i have kind of lost my enthusiasm about it, until i start talking about it, and then the enthusiasm returns in one form or another. which reminds me that i need to work on it asap. It's like i need to light a fire under my butt to get anything done. Senior-itis has come sooner than i would have liked, it seems.

Speaking of fires...here is a shot that i took a couple months ago of the fire tower that is on the top of Ossipee Hill, which i live on.



Wednesday, October 22, 2008

let's get this book started, shall we?

ok, so, i hung up my first "drafts" of my book idea for my thesis. i had eight spreads up on the wall for crit yesterday, which was a lot for me to get done. some of the pages were half blank, because i didn't have anything at the moment to fill in the space without making it look weird. i got a lot of feedback that help with questions i had about it...is the page size good? the line design on each page? too much type? not enough images? larger images? etc.

i definitely need to continue writing for the book, that's a no brainer, but it just takes time and enthusiasm to get done, and i don't want to just half-ass it either. so, that has been added to my to-do list for the next week, along with working on an artist bio, and my "trajectory presentation" for my critical approaches class. no more research projects to do this semester, thank god.

well, here is a photo i took this past weekend, it's included in my book plan.
the photo is of a group of mailboxes, seen in the part of town that i used to live.


Wednesday, October 15, 2008

what to do, what to do?

i have so many things that need to done for school right now that i don't know where to start. and i know that it will just get worse as the year goes on. my thesis work has taken a slight "back-seat" to everything else at the moment, which i know is a very bad decision, but other things are more important at the moment to get done and get done right.

i tried to convince myself that a 4 day weekend vacation from school would do some good to relax and not think about school work. boy, was i wrong. when i came back monday afternoon, i was more worried and stressed about things to do this week than i was when i left on friday. the only good thing that ran through my mind the whole weekend was about how good the photos i took while in greenville would look really good in a portfolio, even if they have absolutely nothing to do with my thesis.

oh well. what's done is done, and there's nothing more for me to do than to get over this and continue to work on assignments for school. which is what i plan to do tomorrow. just need to remember that this semester is almost done, which is a sigh of relief and a scream of horror at the same time. i'll be happy when it's all over.

anyways, here's a photo i took in blanchard, maine, where my families "camp" is. it's a view from a ledge of slate that is man-made. it's right next to where the slate quarries are, there's at least two of them up there in the side of the mountain.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

just a try

ok, so. this is my first blog entry... ever. well, besides on myspace, but that dosen't count.
no classes for the next couple days, because of Columbus Day vacation. so, that gives plenty of time to catch up on overwhelming amounts of homework. *yay* too bad that i'm going away to Greenville for 4 whole days. but, i'll be taking plenty of photographs the whole time that i'm not on the back of an atv. :)
(took this the last time i went up to greenville)
hopefully by the time i get back on monday, i'll be a little less stressed out from schoolwork and making up my mind about which direction i'm going for my thesis, and i'll have photos to post on here :D